Fiendin’ for Socks
Jan/103
Author: ted
body by satan!
You just never know.
An ad I saw on Facebook.
Many parents just don’t realize that a SINGLE DIRTY SOCK can be one of many things– a meth lab, a hidden marijuana plant, or even a crack rock!
Sure it may not look like any of those things, but remember– socks are dirty, deceptive criminals that can turn on you in a second.
But on the real, there is no way a sock can be huffing paraphernalia. All I can imagine is if you soak the sock in paint thinner or something, in which case the sock would be noticeably different (it would be soaked in fucking paint thinner.) But you don’t need a sock for that; you can do it out of the container. Dirty laundry is irrelevant to huffing anything.
I can only imagine that one of drugfree.org’s teen informant has run out of ideas and is now laughing his ass off. He probably got $500 to tell them that kids somehow use socks to get high.
If I’m wrong and you find your kid getting high off socks, he probably deserves the brain damage he’ll get from huffing things. But let me know about it so I can laugh at them.
Trapped Dumb Girls Call for Help On Facebook
Sep/092
Author: ted
body by satan!
Two girls somehow got stuck in a sewer tube, so they figured it would be a wonderful idea to update their facebook status about it instead of calling emergency services.
The Metropolitan Fire Service (MFS) in Adelaide says it is worrying that two girls lost in a stormwater drain raised the alert on a social networking site rather than ringing triple-0 [Australian equivalent of 911].
The 10- and 12-year-old girls updated a Facebook status to say they were lost in a drain on Honeypot Road at Hackham in Adelaide’s southern suburbs on Sunday night.
Glenn Benham from the MFS says it was fortunate a young friend was online at the time and was able to call for help for them.
“It is a worry for us because it causes a delay on us being able to rescue the girls,” he said.
Oh wow. Really?
It’s not as if they were unable to call for help. If they could access facebook, they obviously had a connection. Seriously, it’s stupid enough to get stuck in a fucking drain tube in the first place. But then calling for help on facebook? Really?
Good thing I don’t get stuck in tubes.
:(
I would be dead. Assholes.
Kanye West Interrupts Taylor Swift at MTV VMA’s
Sep/090
Author: ted
body by satan!Kanye West is a corporate low-talent disgrace to hip hop and rap. So of course he was invited to the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards, and apparently he interrupted Taylor Swift during her acceptance speech.
Now it’s not like I’m surprised this happened, because Kanye is a douche bag. It just reminded me a lot of MTV and when it used to be good. I remember when I was young watching actual music videos on MTV (WHAT A CONCEPT) from real musical artists like Nine Inch Nails, The Avalanches, and Dead Kennedys. It seems now they’ve replaced all traces of actual music with plasticized Kanye West bullshit and snotnosed teens crying at their 16th birthday party because their new Corvette isn’t the right color. I don’t think anyone with a real taste for music or entertainment would disagree that MTV is made of shit now and is completely sold out.
In other news, Kanye West is a gay fish, and nobody cares about Taylor Swift.